What to do if your life partner is not aligned with your feelings

Marriage is a silent promise to get committed to one person despite their mistakes. I mean, if you fight with your friends you can be without talking to them or incase of close friends demand an explanation from them. With your family, it becomes an open communication where you ask for what you want and tell them upfront what you feel in your mind. A life partner is neither like a family nor like a friend, the communication between the married couple certainly must be different than any other relation.

You tend to bond with a person with certain expectations and try to experience the journey with mutual co operation but what happens in the process? Consider your partner has an outing personality and all that you prefer is staying indoors on a perfect holiday, how can you work on getting on a common ground? May be one of you tend to adjust to workout the relation, what happens next? The one who adjusted just have to keep adjusting as the other person assumes he/she is comfortable with it. This continues until the saturation point is reached when you wish to communicate to your partner that things are not working out. Since you have been doing something you don’t like for a while now, the tone of your conversation changes and you tend to expose your frustration which will bring irritation to your partner and what happens next is a fight between you both.

Let us now think about another case where you tend to tell your partner in the very start itself that you both don’t have common interests and may be you are not inclined to your partner decision. Now, People start to get offended and act as per their free will just to prove they are in a democratic nation and free will is important

The common mistake in both the cases is communication gap. Either you say it or don’t say it, things will still be the same but what makes the difference is the way you say it and being empathetic to your partner

Giving time to understand your partner is important. Again if the efforts are only from one person then it brings no change, only mutual understanding brings a change and this connection has to be built by communication in the right way. The only solution for a successful relation thus is the place, time and tone of communication whatsoever your point might be.